October 2010 Edition

New Firsts at the Manor

Several wonderful things have been happening at the manor as our ace reporters have discovered. It seems the manor grandchildren are nearly as talented as the monarch and the matron. We hope you enjoy the following reports from two of our top reporters.

Bailee Surprises All

Young Miss Bailee Morrison, granddaughter of the monarch and matron of the manor, proved her genetic connection to the matron today as she began and completed her first sewing machine project. A very proud Miss Bailee is seen here working on and sewing her very first pillow case. Experts reviewing these photographs have been amazed at her abilities.

Miss Bailee practices her technique before beginning her first real project.

Below Miss Bailee is seen beginning her project, pinning the seam she is preparing to sew. Notice the intense concentration which characterizes the young lady.

Youngest Manor Grandchild Impresses All Readers

5-year-old Morgan amazed her older sister as she read her first book without any help. "I have been very impressed with Morgan's attitude and discipline," commented someone who might have been in the schoolroom that day. Said book told the story of Bob and how someone sat on his head.

Young Mrs. Morrison Not So Young Any More

Inside sources have confirmed that we can no longer refer to the oldest manor child as young Mrs. Morrison. She is now officially just Mrs. Morrison, having passed yet another birthday. Celebrations included a delicious dinner prepared by the matron, along with a chocolate cheesecake that brought 5-star reviews from anyone who knew how to review. No-longer-young Mrs. Morrison received help from her daughters to finally achieve blowing out all the candles, possibly just before those candles set the house on fire.

Monarch's Sister Visits the Manor
Unable to stay away any longer, the monarch's sister and her husband stopped by to visit both the monarch and his wonderful wife. Unable to stand being around such greatness, they left after only two nights in the manor.

The monarch's younger sister tries to smile, knowing that the youngest manor child will steal all the attention from this photograph. Sources tell us that this smile is the largest one seen on the sister's face in several years. Her happiness was total as she experienced being in the presence of the manor family.

Random Shot

No-longer-young Mrs. Morrison smiles as she collapses at the dinner table while her husband tries to look unconcerned but ends up looking like he has a stomach ache.

Amazing Amanda Spotted Near Sacramento

Terrific Trudy Continues to Text

As always, our reporters have been scouring the country to find any and all news available about the amazing Crutchfield family and the activities at the manor. This issue is dedicated to the amazing matron of the manor who truly is an inspiration to all who admire her. One of our loyal readers submitted this poem in her honor:

The matron of the manor,

To whom can she compare?

There is none like her

and none can her clothes wear.

Her sweet, charming smile,

Her outstanding wit,

No, none can compare,

There is no fit.

Forever will she live

In my mind and heart

If ever some catastrophe

Should make her depart.

As always, our readers comments are welcome. Please send all pictures or news items to the Chronicle Staff.

A Day in the Life...

After several days of frustrated efforts, one of our inside sources managed to video the youngest grandchild as she attempts telling an exciting story using an unidentified maleable material to illustrate. She is soon thwarted in this new activity, but our source assured us she was later successful as we would expect.

Michigan Report

After receiving a tip that some of the Crutchfield manor family members may be hiding in Michigan, we sent our senior reporter to said state to investigate. Following some great detective work, he was able to locate several extended family members in addition to one of the manor daughters and her husband. The following is his report:


Family Sighted in Michigan
While hunting for any news of the manor family, I was able to locate the matron's daughter hiding in the matron's sister's house. Sneaking under the window and using my super-secret-snoop camera I was able to take these photos. I know our subscribers will enjoy them even though the story they tell is somewhat disturbing.

This was the first time I had witnessed the matron's sister. The first thing one notices about her is her amazing arms. She must be able to lift the whole family at once. She may even be stronger than the matron

herself.

As I panned my camera around the room, I found the matron's daughter involved in an attempt to scare a little boy using a toy tiger. The young boy was quietly playing while the daughter, dressed in her Sunday best, was subtlely approaching with the tiger.

Unable to stop his ferocious wife, said daughter's husband watched with a tearful eye as his beloved wife began to make strange roaring noises. It was fortunate for the wife that the matron's sister was too far away to use her powerful arm to stop the attack.

Later in the afternoon, I witnessed a strange ritual. All of the family members began to sing. It started with the matron's sister and daughter doing an unusual dance routine while singing the praises of the matron.

What happened next was truly incredible. The matron's sister began to grow or stretch until her head bumped the lower part of the ceiling. She continued to sing while the others looked on.

Unable to contain herself, the daughter began singing a happy tune about the joys of having the matron as her mother. If the sister had not been so stretched beside her, it would have been an enjoyable thing to watch. Instead the strange event became even stranger.

The man who turned out to be the matron's father began singing, if one can call that noise singing, to the dice on the table where several members of the family were playing Yahtze. Unfortunately for the father, his vocal vibrations had little effect on the terrible roll before him.

It was at that point the daughter's husband began to make his own music. His unusual singing style did not seem to bother the father who sat quietly smiling beside him.

Apparently no one was supposed to follow the daughter's husband's performance. I report this based on the fact that after a brief silence, the daughter began to sing again. Even though this particular member of the family can indeed produce pleasant vocal vibrations, her husband raced across the room to silence her by forcibly closing her mouth. I wondered if I should do something to stop the rather violent action but it was over quickly with no apparent damage to the daughter.

Indeed, the daughter's husband seemed quite proud of himself as seen in this picture of his pleased smile. The strangeness was not yet over. After holding that smile for approximately ten minutes without moving, the second act began.

It was the husband himself who started it. He began to sing,... well, some would call it screech,... while eating his food. It was both disturbing and fascinating.

He was quickly joined by the sister whose eyes took on an eerie glow while she attempted to harmonize with the screech.

Apparently this type of singing must be done with food on your way to your mouth. The matron's mother, who was unable to spear her food, could not join in. I cannot report on what her voice may be able to produce at this time.

In this reporter's opinion, the matron was wise to leave her family and move to Idaho. The Chronicle Staff had originally assumed the manor occupants were hiding from the press, but we are now considering the possibility that they are hiding from this strange branch of the family.

Editor's Note

This reporter left the scene of the strange singing ritual somewhat confused and disoriented. Several days later we received this photograph from another part of Michigan showing the daughter trying to make her two cats kiss. We here at The Chronicle are hopeful that the daughter and her husband may return to Idaho in the near future to be away from the strange influences of Michigan.

Family Members Spotted At The Zoo

The inhabitants of the Crutchfield Manor have been very secretive this past year. Although we have tried valiantly to report the activities of the manor, several of our reporters have been spotted and escorted from the manor grounds. In an effort to continue to provide information to our readers, we have placed our best reporters all around the nation in hopes of garnishing any news of this illustrious family. To date we have only encountered limited success. Our Michigan reporter has spotted Trudy and her husband Jeffrey in several cities there. It is rumored among the natives that Jeffrey spends his time working with pizza. We have not been able to ascertain if he is creating or eating said pizza but will continue to search for answers.

Meanwhile, the amazing Amanda has been on the move in an effort to escape detection. It was only after one of our reporters suffered serious injury that she was spotted working at a hospital in the San Francisco area. We will not divulge the name of said hospital as we do not want our readers to invade said hospital in an effort to see her.

Kim has been the largest challenge to find. It seems she has almost completely disappeared. We will continue to search for this interesting member of the manor family.

We finally had a breakthrough with the manor grandchildren this week as you can see in the following photographs:

One of our underground reporters spotted several members of the extended Crutchfield Manor family at the zoo this week. The family has been unavailable for pictures or comment for some time now so this was quite an exciting development. Audrey Morrison, seen here, did try to disguise the girls by spraying them with skin coloring agent, but our ace reporter was not fooled by the coloring agent or Mrs. Morrison's sun glasses or Tinkerbell backpack.

Mrs. Morrison also attempted to hide the girls in a native hut but was unsuccessful.

After a valiant attempt to lose our ace reporter, the young girls were caught at a gambling wheel. At first glance, our reporter assumed the young girls were indeed gambling, but then realized they were actually attempting to keep others from this dark activity. While Bailee blocked the evil wheel, the young Morgan ran for help from her mother. What honorable children are these two grandchildren of the manor!

The youngest Morrison daughter was also caught helping a young elephant with a stuffy nose. Is there no end to the goodness of this family?

Based on this amazing photograph, it is the opinion of the Chronicle staff that Mrs. Morrison may be training to become one of our ace photographers.

We encourage our readers to keep their ears open for any news about this amazing family. They have become very adept at keeping their privacy, which we highly respect, but also know that our readers are desperate for news about the members of the manor. We here at the Chronicle will continue to monitor tips as they arrive in an effort to provide our readers with the biggest and best news available.

Crutchfield Family Seen in Utah

Our ace photographer caught this terrified expression on the face of Amazing Amanda Crutchfield recently in an amusement park in Utah where the family had gone for a few days of rest and relaxation. Sources tell us it was not so relaxing for Amazing and the monarch and matron on the way. Not far outside of Mountain Home they witnessed a motorcycle accident in front of them on the freeway. Within seconds Amazing was out and tending to the needs of the woman who slid across the road while the manly monarch helped to clear the road and direct traffic until the ambulence arrived and the injured were escorted to the nearest hospital. The matron, who ever keeps her cool, had quickly dialed 911 and had an ambulence on the way.

Upon notifying Mrs. Audrey Morrison that they would be late, they proceeded on their perilous quest only to be stopped again by a flat tire. By this time it was already dark so while the monarch unloaded the trunk to reach the spare, the matron once again proved her worth with the cell phone and texted Mrs. Morrison once more. It was decided by the wise monarch to spend the night in a nearby village, although it was difficult to find a hotel that met Amazing's high standards. Mrs. Morrison was very understanding, refraining herself to a small complaint that this was very inconvenient for her as the monarch's car was carrying the eating utensils for the group.

The following morning, Amazing once again showed her amazingness by whipping out her credit card and allowing the monarch to buy new tires for her. The monarch, giddy with anticipation, left the hotel very early and returned with the best tires he could find.

The monarch did not let his age stop him - he rode several roller coasters with the younger members of the family without fear or consequence...sort of.

Covering his eyes after the roller coaster rides helped with the small after-effects. Unfortunately it took several hours for this expression to leave his face.

The youngest of the clan did her best to remain in cognito. We at the Chronicle understand the challenges of living in a famous family. We do our best to give the family their privacy, but we know that our readers want to know all about their lives. It's a tough balancing act.

Mrs. Morrison also tried to hide her identity by plastering her hair to her head and wearing nondiscript sunglasses. It might have worked better had young Bailee been able to look at her without feeling repulsed. The Chronicle staff believes that Audrey's act of hiding her neck probably was very effective.

More News from the Manor

Our hidden sources in Stanley, Idaho, informed us earlier this week that the monarch and the matron were seen scaling the mountains outside their fair village. Kim O'Connor was also with them. They were seen the following day at a local pizza place eating a large pizza with great gusto. What an amazing couple!

Medical Update

Although it has been several months since the initial injury, the matron continues to patiently and quietly deal with her shoulder pain. Sources near to her claim it will be several more months before she can expect a full recovery. Her fine example of silent suffering has been an inspiration to all.

Meanwhile, in an effort to gain some attention for himself, the monarch threw his back out tieing his shoe. A single trip to the chiropractor seems to have done the trick. Some of our advisors warn that age may have something to do with this injury epidemic, but experts tell us this is not so. We believe the experts.

Special Announcement

The Chronicle staff is back in the office! Production to begin soon!!!

January 19, 2009

The Holidays Have Come and Gone at the manor, but our staff was able to sneak in a few photographs from our hidden photographers inside said manor.

Young Bailee was pleased with her pajamas for this year. They were long enough to drag on the ground - just as a princess' pajamas should.

Younger Morgan was also pleased although our fashion guru is convinced these pajamas are slightly over-sized. No problem. The top functions as a night gown and the fleece is toasty warm.

Older Amazing Amanda amazed all with her ability to once again find the "Banged Can Lid" Christmas ornament. She just never ceases to amaze.

And here we have the matron showing the price that the monarch did NOT pay for the tree.

In other news....

It seems there was an unannounced ballet production at the manor house Friday evening.

From the editor:

Today's edition is somewhat shorter than usual but we hope to be back to full production at some point. We appreciate your patience.

December 2 edition

Thanksgiving Comes to the Manor

It was a happy Trudy who viewed with satisfaction and hunger the two large bowls of mashed potatoes at the manor feast. Even she could not eat all those potatoes. The matron proved once again that she could provide what was necessary to make her family happy and stuffed.
Awed Guest Bows As Matron Passes
One of the many guests at the manor could not contain herself but fell nearly prostrate as the matron passed by. This was an understandable reaction but the matron, of course, was surprised at this show of adoration.

Monarch Attacked By Angry Game-Player

Who WAS this person who, completely unprovoked, attacked the monarch in his own home at his own table? What was the motive? Anyone having any information on this assault is encouraged to contact the Editor who will promptly report it to the authorities.

Sean Amazes Manor Guests

Our ace photographer caught this photograph of a photographer's husband trying to impress one of the youngest guests at the manor feast. Judging by the look on her face when she saw his outfit, this reporter would conclude she was not impressed.

Trudy Suffers Unusual Face Disease

As our more perceptive readers may have noticed from the two pictures in today's edition showing young Trudy, Trudy Musser (youngest of the manor children) was suffering from face fixation on Thanksgiving Day in the manor. She was seen with the same expression in several photographs taken at the feast and ensuing festivities. We here at the Chronicle hope she is able to fight off this ailment quickly!

New Pie Record

The standing pie record for previous Thanksgiving feasts at the manor was broken this year when the manor family and their guests managed to produce 24 pies in addition to other desserts on Thanksgiving Day. First-time guests were amazed at all the beautiful pies which included many traditional kinds as well as more exotic kinds. We want to warn our readers: do not try to replicate this at home.

New Vocabulary Update

Two new words were heard by our secret vocabulary spy in the manor.

Thinger: an appendage attached to the hand. Syn.: Finger Ex: I have ten thingers and ten toes.

Expensable: an adjective meaning to cost a lot of money. Ex: Grandma, that was VERY expensable.

The same secret vocabulary spy also heard the following explanation:

"I know why they call them cotton balls - because cots are soft and fuzzy and so are cotton balls and they're shaped like a ball."

November 24 Edition

The Longest Necklace Ever

The manor has done it again - an amazing story from this reporter with pictures to prove it. Sometime during the past week, someone in the manor created the longest necklace ever. As you can see from the pictures, this incredible piece of jewelry is much too long to wear in a single strand. Even the matron is not tall enough to wear this one. Only in the manor could such a thing as this happen.

The Morgan Mermaid

Our ace photographer was able to sneak into the bathroom to snap this unusual photograph of one of the manor grandchildren. Some say she just appeared in the water while others claim she swam in through the drain. Our photographer cannot confirm or discount any of the claims at this writing.

Monarch Begins New Chapter in RV Work

This is the week the monarch begins providing mobile RV service for his company, according to reliable sources. We tried to interview the monarch himself, but he was far too busy preparing his mobile shop for its first appointment on Tuesday. However, sources who were hiding in the manor driveway were able to sneak a peek at the aforementioned trailer when the monarch showed the matron what he had been doing. "It's really something!"

Strange Quiet Settles Over the Manor

Our hidden microphones inside the manor provided little to hear this morning as the manor grandchildren are out of town visiting their Morrison grandparents this week. There was no school chatter, no reading of stories made up of short vowel words, no recess playing with flying fairies or dancing princesses. However, the matron was seen exiting the house with a plastic bag full of empty toilet paper rolls. Our hidden reporter followed her across the street and down the canal but lost her before she reached her destination. When she returned about an hour later, she was without the plastic sack. What she did with those empty toilet paper rolls remains a mystery at this time. If any of our readers can shed some light on this mystery, please contact the editor.

Excitement Mounts As Holiday Approaches

Preparations have begun for the Thanksgiving feast. The matron is processing her garden pumpkins for the various pies the monarch has promised to produce. The actual kind of pies he plans to make has been kept a guarded secret but we here at the Chronicle are sure they will be amazing. The matron also plans to make some pies but will not disclose the variety. We have contracted with a special reporter to hide himself in the manor on the day of the feast to be able to report on the actual food eaten. Judging from the plans our inside reporter was able to glimpse earlier today, said reporter reports that there appears to be a larger guest list than usual. The monarch was overheard saying, "Just let me take care of finding another table."

Amazing News Is Amazingly Unamazing

Amazing Amanda has vanished from sight. There is no amazing news this week. Isn't that amazing?

November 17 Edition

Matron Amazes All with Her Speedy Recovery

Although she is not yet completely healed, even the monarch has noticed the vast improvement in the matron's condition over the past few days. She is now able to sit through a worship service without much pain and can do quite a bit of bending, according to our matron reporter. The monarch was very gracious to buy her some flat dress shoes so she could once again wear a skirt, which our fashion report reports was very fashionable on Sunday. "She just looks great in EVERYTHING!" an eye-witness confided confidentially to our staff. Of course, we here at the Chronicle are thrilled she is healing so quickly and wish her all the best.

Photography Staff Takes a Week Off

"I decided to let them take a much-needed vacation this week. Our photographers work as hard as any of us to produce this periodical and we truly appreciate all their hard work. It isn't always easy taking the outstanding photos they take." This was how our editor responded to questions from the reporting staff today. In this reporter's opinion, the editor was right. We owe a lot of our success to our photographers.

Monarch Delivers Edifying Sermon on Edification

Sunday evening was the time, the church building was the place, the monarch was the guest speaker for the evening. Comments that might have been heard after the sermon were, "Amazing delivery!" "He didn't even seem nervous." "Great organization and illustrations." "If I were an edifice, I would be quite tall after that amount of edification." The monarch has pleased and amazed the local congregation by signing up to preach at least once each month. We will continue to report on his success in this endeavor.

Morrisons Provide Lunch on Sunday

This just in from our cooking department:
The Morrisons provided lunch for several people on Sunday. Baked potatoes, cheese, chili, and various other foods were available for consumption. Mr. Morrison was the guardian of the brownies as they cooked in the active kitchen, checking on them paranoidedly every few minutes - even taking them out while they were still liquid to keep them from burning. He was successful - they were not burned. They were also not edible at that point, but later they were.

This Week's Vocabulary Builder

This week's newly developed word comes from one of the younger members of the family. Fefuhfuhfuh: a biblical command issued by Jesus. Example: "Do you know what Jesus said for, 'Be opened?' 'Fefuhfuhfuh!' I learned that in my class at church!"

November 10 Edition

Tragedy Strikes at the Manor

It was with great horror and sorrow that our staff learned the matron was in great pain this week after spraining her back. Despite her discomfort and agony, she was all smiles when her family needed her and showed great courage in the face of a prolonged recovery. As of this morning, she was feeling somewhat better and is able to actually sit for short periods of time without too much discomfort. Her prognosis is a full recovery if she follows her doctor's advice and continues to exercise properly. So today she was seen with the monarch walking down Hill Road at a fairly brisk pace as instructed by her chiropractor. In an interview later she revealed that the walk did indeed provide some relief and she plans to continue walking until she is strong enough to go back to the gym. It is with enormous sorrow and disappointment we have to report the blasphemy heard against said matron within the family. Audrey Morrison should have said, "No, Mom, it's not your age. It was just a fluke."

Morgan Morrison Enjoys First Day of School

Young Morgan Morrison spent her first day at school this week when her mother needed to take their family car in for service. Although she brought several of her own activities, she decided to participate in her older sister's projects as much as possible - or at least her version of them. A highlight of the morning was using the white board which is reserved for school use only. Other activities included coloring, cutting, gluing, and playing with Play Doh. Snack time was also a highlight of the morning since she had refused to eat a good breakfast. We do not know when her second day of school will be.

Vocabulary Builder

This week we are privileged to introduce a new section to our wonderful periodical. From time to time we will endeavor to increase our readers' vocabulary by introducing them to new words as they are developed. This week's new word is a verb: to Play Doh. Example: "Dwandma, I'm done Play Dohing."

Contest Updates

The Water Contest was put on hold while both contestants recover from colds.

The Biggest Tomato Growing Contest was won by the matron by default. All other contestants vanished from the face of the earth. If said contestants should reappear, they are welcome to enter their tomatos for judging by the Chronicle staff.

New Literary Challenge

As the holidays are approaching, we here at the Chronicle would like to encourage those of our readers with literary ability and those who wish they had literary ability to participate in a new peotry challenge. Our last such challenge had several imaginative entries which were enjoyed by all our readers. We hope many more will try their hand at this challenge. As always, the editor reserves the right to do whatever in this challenge. We wish you all good luck.

A New Month, More Stories from the Manor

Sickness Strikes the Manor

Alas, it is true. The matron is ill with the same cold that her eldest daughter and granddaughters have. Our sources inside the manor have confirmed that she is dealing with this little setback in her usual brave and gracious way. We here at the Chronicle wish her a very speedy recovery.

Ben Delivers Educational Lesson

Not-as-young-as-he-used-to-be Ben Morrison presented a fine lesson at the local congregation Sunday evening on how to teach someone the gospel. His delivery was animated and interesting, and most of the audience could read at least parts of what he wrote on the board because he was kind enough to tell us what it said.

Amazing Amanda Returns from Another Amazing Vacation

Mexico will not be the same now that this amazing young lady has returned from a week's vacation in the impoverished country. Our reporters have not been able to receive any comment from her about her trip, but we are fairly certain that she awed most anyone she met and probably now has an amazing tan.

Trudy Increases Knowledge of Cleaning Tools

Witnesses confirmed that still-young Trudy Musser has again increased her knowledge of various cleaning tools from a quick lesson from the ailing matron. Despite her weakened condition, the matron was willing to answer questions from her youngest daughter on spray nossle education. Being the quick learner she is, Trudy immediately understood the matron's instructions and will now how the cleanest bathroom ever.

The Monarch Leads an Educational Singing

"Outstanding," "Very musical," "What a leader!" were some of the comments that might have been commented following the singing held at the Morrison house on Saturday evening. The purpose of this particular singing was to educate interested members of the congregation in new songs so that those same songs might be led in a worship service and enough people would know how to sing them that it wouldn't sound bad. Those involved made some beautiful music even though many were beginning to succomb to colds. Unfortunately the following Sunday evening, the colds had managed to quiet most of the sopranos and the monarch was disappointed with the result when he led one of the aforementioned songs. We at the Chronicle are sure that once the sopranos have their voices back, the monarch will be satisfied and pleased with the songs. Part of the problem may have been that Amanda was not there to cover for those who could not sing.

Letters to the Editor

Dear Editor:
I was so pleased to know the Crutchfield Chronicles is in print again. I thought my subscription had expired because I had not received this excellent publication for years. Please keep up the good work.
A devoted reader.
P.S. I especially enjoy pictures and news about the manor grandchildren.

Dear devoted reader,
We may have received hundreds of letters similar to yours but yours was the most elequent so we chose to print it here. We also enjoy the news and pictures of the manor grandchildren but unfortunately there was not a lot of grandchildren action this week at the manor as they were both sick. We hope to have more news to report next week. Thank you for your continued support.
The Editor

More Manor News for Inquiring Minds

Crutchfield Manor the Site of Shortest Recital Ever

Saturday evening the matron hosted a piano recital for her two piano students, Bailee Morrison and Abigail Johnson, and a guest student from the area, Miss Jannae Cox. All three pianists did well and all guests were greatly entertained by the very short recital which probably lasted about 7 minutes. "The refreshments following the event were fantastic!" replied one guest interviewed by our reporter. When asked who made said refreshments, the answer was "Why, the matron, of course."

However, there was an unusual effect caused by the event. Several participants were so awed by the matron that they experienced a rather trance-like state for a split second after seeing her stand by the piano. When young Abby Johnson asked if one day she might be as marvelous as the matron and was told it was probably impossible, she reacted rather violently as you can see in the above photo.

Other entertainment was provided by Morgan Morrison at the end of Miss Johnson's performance in the form of a percussion-type performance of her own.

Monarch Continues His Hectic Schedule

Despite concern from the family, the monarch continued to work his three jobs this week. We here at the Chronicle are amazed by his stamina and dedication to his family in this endeavor. We know it takes a strong man to achieve what he is achieving. He did, however, take one evening off to spend a little time with the matron this week. Our souces claim they spent the evening dining at a local restaurant called "Famous Dave's" which seems appropriate for this couple.

Kittens Abound in the Extended Family

Over the past few weeks, the manor children have adopted two kittens. Tink lives with the Morrison family and Muffie lives with the Musser family. Both kittens are gray and adorable; however, Jeff is convinced that the Musser kitten is more adorable than the Morrison kitten. As of this printing, our staff does not have a picture of the Musser kitten but we are happy to publish this picture of the Morrison kitten for your viewing pleasure.

As you can see, the Morrison kitten is fascinated with noses.

Continuing updates from previous weeks...

As promised in an earlier edition, we have at least one more update from weeks gone by concerning the monarch and matron. This latest in from our Morrison house reporter:

October 11 was the date of the most recent birthday party in the manor family. While all enjoyed the celebration, there were moments when a strange illness lurking in the Morrison house manifested itself. As you can see from the following photographs, the illness caused startling changes in the features of those affected. Of course the matron was not affected as she is not subject to feature-changing illnesses.

Sean and Kim were affected first. Neither was aware of the change in countenance.

Shortly after noticing the symptoms in Sean and Kim, our photographer noticed that Ben had began showing symptoms.

If you look closely in this photo, you can see the beginning of the symptoms affecting the monarch. Even as the children enjoyed the cake, the disease was spreading. Perhaps covering her ears was what saved Morgan from the awful countenence changing affect.

In this photo our photographer captured the face of the monarch as the disease progressed. You can also see that now little Bailee is also suffering symptoms. Fortunately for all this was a very short-lived condition that is showing no continuing side effects.

Literary Contest to Begin Soon

The Chronicle will be sponsering a literary contest soon. Stay tuned for future announcements.

Water Challenge Update

Our inside reporter recently discovered the water challenge between the matron and her daughter Audrey continues on. As of this printing they were still in a tie.

Please send your stories about the monarch family to the editor via the comment section of this edition.